Helicopter Parents – Do They Help Or Hurt?

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Each parent has his or her own thoughts on parenting. What they all have in common is that they only want the best for their children.

Is there really any right or wrong answer when it comes to parenting?

Well, sometimes the desire to protect and control goes a little too far. And this is where helicopter parents come into play.

Our guide will help you learn all the characteristics of this parenting style. You’ll also learn how helicopter parents can slowly change their attitude to become less overprotective and more objective.

What Is A Helicopter Parent?


Imagine a parent who constantly hovers on their child’s periphery. They try to anticipate their every need. They’re ready and willing to go above and beyond to make their child’s life as simple and easy as possible.

This is the essence of helicopter parenting: a parent who is so concerned with their child’s wellbeing that they don’t give their child enough freedom or opportunity for autonomy. 

In fact, some experts believe that helicopter parenting is what lead to the creation of generation snowflake.

All parents want their young ones to become the best they can be. But sometimes that desire leads to overprotective parenting.

Jon and Missy Butcher, Authors of Mindvalley Lifebook Program, came up with an excellent approach to learning how to raise extraordinary kids. For helicopter parents, the Butcher’s approach may seem controversial, but sometimes the best way to break out of a parenting rut is to delve into a radical new way of looking at the world.

Why do people become helicopter parents?

Parents “hover” over their kids’ heads for several reasons. Here are some of the most common causes that lead to becoming a helicopter parent:

1. Anxiety

Everyday problems related to work, the economy, life, and the world in general, cause parents to fret about their children. It’s an overwhelming world we live in, with lots of changes happening at a rapid pace.

Helicopter parents are afraid for their children. They begin taking more control over their young ones’ lives. They believe that this is the best way to keep them from being hurt or disappointed.

2. Overcompensation

Some parents, when they were kids, were neglected or ignored. With the intention of making up for that deficiency, these parents work to overcompensate with their own kids.

3. Fear of dire consequences

Some parents are afraid that their children won’t be able to deal with unhappiness, failure, and uncertainty. They believe that they can help their children avoid failure.

4. Peer pressure

Sometimes when a parent sees the way other parents care for their children, they feel an inherent pressure to do the same. As a matter of fact, the belief they are not giving themselves as much as some other parents trigger overparenting.

overparenting

What is an overbearing mother?

The middle name for pretty much all mothers worldwide is care. But, sometimes (quite unconsciously) this care turns into obsessive behavior.

And this behavior can continue even when those children become parents themselves.

An overbearing mother or father is really no different than a helicopter parent. In both instances, the parent has become too involved in their child’s life. The hallmark behavior of overbearing parents is that they smother their child with overbearing rules, regulations, and expectations.

Dealing with overbearing parents once you have become a parent yourself is a process that takes time and patience. The key to working with an overbearing parent is found in setting boundaries.

Learn to set healthy and reasonable boundaries that you’re both comfortable with. Communicate about your needs and expectations to help strengthen your relationship. Let your parent know that you love and care for them but that you need the opportunity to have experiences of your own.

What is the overbearing definition?

Overbearing can be defined as someone who behaves with oppressive expectations. This label is most often applied to parents but coworkers, friends, and employers can also be overbearing.

What are the four parenting styles?

Parenting styles include the following four types: authoritarian, authoritative, permissive and uninvolved.

Each of these styles represents a various approach to parenting that can be recognized by specific characteristics.

Is any one of these styles preferable to the others? Not really. It’s important to keep in mind that there are many approaches to parenting, each with its own unique set of pros and cons.

The more you understand about your own parenting tendencies, the better able you’ll be to deal with any bumps in the road along the way.

What is a bulldozer parent?

If helicopter parents hover around their children, trying to anticipate their every need, then what’s a bulldozer parent?

Bulldozer parents take helicopter parenting to the extreme. Their intentions are quite similar, but their approach is more aggressive.

Even though they seek to protect their children and have truly admirable intentions, the bulldozer parent (like lawnmower parents) actually creates a fragile and fearful child.

The children of bulldozer parents are often unable to cope with all the challenges life brings. Because they’re not given the opportunity to solve problems on their own, they fail to build essential problem-solving skills from a young age and flounder when faced with life’s difficulties.

snowflake gen

How do I stop being a helicopter parent?

It may seem like quite the challenging task to change your parenting style. But if you are strongly determined and have an effective strategy, you will succeed.

The first step? Stop comparing yourself to other parents. There’s no right or wrong answer when it comes to parenting and beating yourself up isn’t going to help.

Next, learn how and when to get involved in your kid’s life.

Instead of doing things for your kid, implement positive parenting solutions into your behavior. Encourage your children to do things on their own, and be supportive.

Will there be failures along the way? Of course. And while failure is inevitable, it also happens to be a fantastic learning opportunity.


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Have you met a helicopter parent before? What type of parent are you? Share your thoughts with us in the comments below.


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